This refers to Siraj Wahab’s well-researched article, “It’s Another Kind Of Saudization” (July 30, 2009): Marriages with Saudis and the children ensuing from these alliances are often hard hit. Interestingly, as with other things in the Kingdom (jobs, for example) there seems to be a grave insecurity in nearly every aspect of life. Both men and women are not secure in their marriages and their children are regarded as aliens or second-class citizens at best. It is no wonder then that those who can manage it decide to opt for distant lands to materialize their dreams of love, marriage, a comfortable living and most of all, freedom. Ozma Siddiqui, Jeddah published 7 August 2009 (Arab News, Letters To The Editor)
Future Husbands And Wives Of Saudis (FHWS) is owned by Tara Umm Omar. I am an American married to a Saudi. My degree in Anthropology and firsthand experience as a non-Saudi married to a Saudi and living in Saudi Arabia will insha’Allah benefit FHWS and its mission. The main theme of this blog is to help you make an informed decision about marrying a Saudi and guidance on the Saudi marriage permission approval process. It is more of a reference blog rather than an opinion blog.
The initial intent of this blog was to act as a reference source, providing current/past information by citing numerous government laws, news articles and personal stories/interviews. I regularly collect references from different sources conveniently into one place (the FHWS blog) for those embarking upon the Saudi/non-Saudi marriage. Almost eight years ago through personal experience, I witnessed how hard it was to search on this particular subject with most of the information being negative. On FHWS, I endeavor to present both the good and bad aspects of Saudi/non-Saudi marriages and residing in Saudi Arabia.
The theme of FHWS has gone beyond just being a reference blog to giving advice based on my own personal testimonials and that of others both Saudi and non-Saudi. The welcoming and sincere atmosphere that I have created is conducive to discussing the trials and tribulations endured undertaking the marriage permission process. It is an encouragement to those brave enough to beat the odds bi’idhnillah, a forewarning to the unaware to avoid/prevent the pitfalls related to Saudi/non-Saudi marriages (insha’Allah) and as a platform to speak out gently and peacefully against the stringent Saudi/non-Saudi marriage laws.
As a result, FHWS serves as a support network for those non-Saudis and Saudis who are experiencing hardship during the marriage permission approval process and those who have received approval but are still encountering bureaucratic problems due to red tape.
Negatives And Positives
Saudi Arabia has good and bad aspects like any country in the world. And so do the Saudi people just like people from other countries around the world. It is not my intention to portray Saudis or their country in a bad light. I respect them and wish them the best. I realize that some Saudis do not like to read about negative perceptions of themselves but to become a better person and a people, one must learn how to accept and be open to constructive criticism when it is done in an ethical way whether it is about oneself or one’s country. Please remember that FHWS is a reference blog where I aim to present both the positives and negatives about being married to a Saudi and living in Saudi Arabia. Not always you will find an even balance between the good and the bad, sometimes you will have more bad than good. If that is the case, one should not assume that all Saudis are bad and Saudi Arabia is a terrible country. Insha’Allah I hope that the material on FHWS will accumulate more good than bad. Regardless, I have to cover all subjects so that readers can make fully informed decisions. At least they would know what to expect rather than delving into the unknown not knowing what to expect. Non-Saudis have a right to prepare themselves and question whether marrying a Saudi or living in Saudi Arabia is something they really want to do with their life. It would be unfair to them to always present the positive side (sugar coating negatives or never mentioning negatives) to the point that they would be shocked by the negatives they would encounter in the future. If the negative articles on FHWS make you uncomfortable then simply don’t read them and I mean that in a polite way. You are free to either negate or confirm any content on FHWS posts in the comment section, preferably backing up your statements with factual evidence or personal experience. I humbly admit that I am never above correction nor am I perfect. If you think you can help FHWS improve and contribute more positive articles and personal stories, you are welcome to do so. Also if you see positive articles and personal stories dealing with Saudi/non-Saudi marriages whether in Arabic or English, please forward them to emailfhws at gmail dot com and I would be glad to post them on FHWS pending permission of the author.
I Am Not Anti-Saudi
Just for the record, I am not anti-Saudi. Just because I may dislike some things about Saudis and Saudi Arabia does not automatically mean I am anti-Saudi. I take great pains to make sure there is no disrespect towards Saudis and I have zero tolerance for Saudi bashing. My goal is to always strive for a balance between positives and negatives on FHWS however it is apparent that there are more negatives than positives when it comes to being married to a Saudi. And if someone pre-judges me to be anti-Saudi based upon the fact that there are more negatives than positives on FHWS then so be it. I will not go out of my way to prove that I am not anti-Saudi. I know myself and Allah knows my heart and my intentions. I will not stop posting negative articles because the truth needs to be heard, disliked or not.
Submitting Your Personal Story
Are you a non-Saudi who married a Saudi? Divorced from a Saudi or widow(er) of a Saudi? Going through the marriage permission process? A non-Saudi engaged to a Saudi? Or just thinking about marrying a Saudi? Are you a bi-cultural or multi-cultural Saudi? Please share your story! You could help someone in the same situation find solutions to their problems or get support, feedback and questions answered from other readers on your situation. Confidentiality is guaranteed and you can be anonymous or use a first name or nickname. You may write your own story and send it to emailfhws at gmail dot com. However if you are uncertain how to develop your personal story, you can contact emailfhws at gmail dot com for details.
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FHWS Copyright Regulations
Thank you for visiting FHWS!
Tara Umm Omar (owner of FHWS)
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