There are various steps of divorce recovery for men. These steps or approaches may range from the conventional up to the most contemporary and will ultimately work for your benefit. But before you go out to start your search for such methods its best that you understand the stages that you are most likely going through first in order to become more effective in your hunt for solutions. With this being said, here are the five phases of divorce:
Denial
Denial is the very first problem that you will most likely encounter. Divorce for many men (or even can seem unreal at first. The emotional and mental strain it causes as well as the consequences attached can be so difficult to take in all at once that it forces many to deny the fact that what’s happening is real. The characteristics of denial may include:
- Not believing that the divorce will and is going to happen.
- Denying the possibility of life after divorce.
- Denying the consequences of divorce.
- Acting childishly whenever confronted with the issue.
Anger
Anger is the second phase of divorce. When everything starts to dawn on you and when reality hits, it will hurt – a lot. This can leave you very upset, bitter and generally angry towards those who have caused you so much pain and grief. In worst cases your anger can get out of hand and even hurt those who would do nothing more except offer their help or those who are totally unrelated and can even be considered victims of the divorce themselves – your children for example. Some of the most common characteristics that will define this phase will include:
- Lashing out
- Being bitter, resentful and withdrawn.
- Deliberately sabotaging things in the hopes of getting even.
- Substance abuse.
Bargaining
The bargaining phase is nothing more than act of desperation to counter what is happening – an act of desperation and nothing more. You beg and plead sacrificing even your self-respect in a last ditch effort that deep inside even you, know, will never work. Some of the things you will mostly find yourself doing (unless you stop yourself that is) during this stage would include:
- Plead for reconsideration and reconciliation.
- Blackmailing your ex-wife to get back together.
- Trying to get back to your old life instead of moving on to a new one.
Depression
Depression will be the last and hardest phase that you will be confronting with. When all your efforts at getting back, getting angry or pleading are in vain, you will most likely find yourself feeling helpless, powerless and empty. Some of the things you might experience or show when under the influence of depression will include.
- Emotional withdrawal from society as well as life.
- Lack of energy and purpose.
- Full blown clinical depression.
- …and even suicidal tendencies (in worst cases)
Acceptance
There is only one true way to achieve recovery, and that is through acceptance. This is the final phase of your journey. This will and should serve as your target. The path to acceptance will be difficult, painful, and can even be long. But it is not impossible to achieve, as long as you understand the stages and what you will be able to do in order to overcome them, you will eventually get to this point – a point of new beginnings and happier moments.
If you want to know not only the steps of divorce recovery for men, but also how to speed through these and not be caught up in the destructive actions that they can cause, click below to find out more …
Whenever I see an article about divorce, or watch a news or current affair report about life of divorcees it always seems to focus on the woman’s plight and not any problems of men. Divorce & depression are partners for men after a marriage fails and recent reports have suggested that men take divorce a lot harder than women for a number of reasons.